Unleashing the Cougar is no more
Welcome, everyone, to the new-look me! You can expect the same sassy attitude, thoughtful, soul-searching articles, and sexy, authentic stories as you’ve enjoyed for the past two and a bit years since I launched this blog in September 2017.
My new home page tells the story about why I’ve moved away from the whole cougar thing, but just between you and me, I always felt it was a bit of a liability.
For the long term, it was not an identity that resonated, especially since I now have a partner who’s a member of my own generation! And for those of you new to my story, I met him online. You can read about it here.
It’s been at least 18 months since I even thought of a pretty young thing. Nothing against younger men – they can still turn my head – but when I found myself single after a long, long marriage, it was an itch I needed to scratch.
I married young. When I was last single, I was in my late teens. I guess it’s only natural (and not uncommon) that I defaulted again to younger men, sometimes a lot younger! I experimented with living poly solo for a couple of years, and during that time had several ongoing relationships with men significantly my junior. The closest was my intimate partner who was half my age.
It was quite a journey into dating again as an adult, an awful lot of disappointing sex with new partners (and some good times too), new friendships, and a few meaningful but rebellious relationships. I needed to question everything and give voice to the stifled young woman who’d played wife and mum for too long.
Those three-plus years dating again helped me to realise that I am, in fact, in mid life. And that’s OK. I’m getting closer, as I get older, with accepting who I am NOW – not who I was at 18, or 25 or 38. My life is still a work in progress, as is this blog, which I will gradually hone to distance myself from the ‘cougar’ notion and name.
I’ve got a ripper of a feature interview coming up next, so stay tuned, check your inbox and catch you soon!
Eveย
Great post๐
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you!
LikeLike
No problem ๐ check out my blog when you get the chance ๐
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh wow, I just did! Hours of reading there! Thanks!
LikeLike
I can’t wait to read the links inside this post. Congrats on the next step! ๐
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks so much! Yes I’d love to hear your views on those articles ๐
LikeLike
Yay!! How exciting to evolve personally & creatively- canโt wait to read your new stuff here. Well done ๐ฅฐ๐
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks G. You know that feeling when something feels right and authentic? I feel that now about my project, and Iam keen to get the wheels moving before I get any older!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have 100% faith in your abilities and passion, thatโs for sure ๐ช๐ผ๐
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you! And I hope you are safe from the fires ravaging Australia. I am, for the moment!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am; before Xmas we had a big scare, & several friends got evacuated, but the winds turned and so they were safe… we are really at the mercy of Mother Nature now arenโt we? ๐๐ผ
LikeLiked by 2 people
Yes, and no room for complacency unless you live in a city!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Gracious. I am you minus two years LOL. I love it. I hope to be writing the same damn thing in two years.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well, I’m sure you’ll evolve as we all do ๐
LikeLike
What? I can’t believe it Eve! But good for you. We’ll read with anticipation. We both love your posts and shares
X
N
LikeLiked by 1 person
What can’t you believe my dears? That I loathe the term ‘cougar’ and its negative connotations? Sadly, I can’t push uphill alone to redefine that word. Onwards and upwards towards my book being widely accessible and read across the world! As Scarlett would say, “Yassss!”
LikeLiked by 2 people
Yasssss indeed! I’m excited that you’re embracing your shifting identity – aren’t we all always a work in progress? GO YOU GOOD THING!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, just when I was starting to feel stuck, a new friend came along and showed me a new path!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I absolutely love this blog. I’ve learnt so much more about the world of dating and navigating my way back into it after a long hiatus offline and not dating. It’s entertaining, funny, and vulnerable.
I love the new name too. I’d love to read a book. Will there be a book? Please say yes!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks for your comment and kind words Esther! I very much hope there will be a book soon ๐
LikeLike
Finding this blog was a godsend for me, Eve’s candid account of her sexual expeditions mirrored my own experiences in the midlife dating quagmire. Ten out of ten for real-life accuracy and thrilling reading – I can’t wait to get my hands on the book.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow, thank you! I really do hope there is a book after such high expectations! In the meantime, keep reading here and watch this space. Thank you for your kind words ๐
LikeLike
How exciting! Onwards and upwards – wishing you well for the new adventure, and can’t wait to see you in ‘print’ – in book form, I mean. Your words are always insightful and entertaining.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Heather, hope so too! And high praise coming from you ๐
LikeLike
Hello my friend. The new direction was inevitable now that you are happily settled, and I am very happy for you.
I guess that in these circumstances it must be a challenge to write new content, though, whilst still retaining the spirit of your blog? I will be interested to see your future writing for sure!
I admire you greatly for your honest writing and your free-spirited nature and you were an inspiration to me when I started my own blog. Wishing you all the best!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you Darren, and you are right. Life changes and offers us new challenges xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Love the new name, babe. Just wanted to say that your blog is so bloody refreshing! Older womenโs sexuality is so often packaged as shameful or the butt of a joke, and is rarely shared from the womanโs perspective, at least in popular culture. You write of the complexities of mid-life dating and mating with great honesty and thoughtfulness, balancing the intimate and personal with the broader perspective. So many women find themselves on this journey in mid-life and need authentic voices like yours to help make sense of their own experiences and, more than that, know that theyโre not alone. Thank you for sharing.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you! I could not have expressed the need for these type of blogs better myself! xx
LikeLike
Love the new name Eve! Well done ๐ It unashamedly defines an audience who I think have been left off the bookshelf – literally. Who is writing about the confluence of experiences that current midlifers are facing? These are people who did not grow up with technology yet need it now if they want any action at all – whether it be because they are separated and single or wanting to open their long term partnership up to others. Midlifers are also often chastised by the media or in private conversations for having a ‘crisis’ if they seek any type of personal evolution or exploration at this stage. So your new name is very refreshing because it reframes things as an adventure – not a crisis. And it’s not something just for the fresh faced. Seeking new relationships and fun is fine to do at any age. Dare I say it but I think the new title is age friendly! It fuses sexy with maturity – something that our youth focussed culture often does not. And I love your thoughtful blogs Eve. Your writing has substance but is also sassy. Look forward to seeing more!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much Narissa. I love this comment because it addresses the social/political side behind my writing, and considers the bigger picture, which is what interests me most. I also like the way you name and shame the stereotypes about midlife people who, understandably in the modern age, look for more life challenges and personal growth. A century ago the average age for a woman was 51 years, now it’s 85 so we really do need to take seriously what we do in our ‘second half’ of life. As Gen Xers, we may even live longer, so we may as well make the most of it!
LikeLike
Eve, you have taken an otherwise taboo subject and given it this raw and reverent meaning. Creating this sacred space that is creative, fluid and honest. Inspiring people and offering hope… Your writing has this refreshing and irrevocable truth that resonates remaining with the reader. Itโs not just enough to inspire, it actually imbues and feels life affirming. Somehow we are not merely witnessing but feel part of your journey.. itโs like being let into a secret .. without the shame..
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love this comment! Thank you so much ๐
LikeLike
I love this comment so much! Thank you ๐
LikeLike