New decade, new name!

Unleashing the Cougar is no more

Welcome, everyone, to the new-look me! You can expect the same sassy attitude, thoughtful, soul-searching articles, and sexy, authentic stories as you’ve enjoyed for the past two and a bit years since I launched this blog in September 2017.

My new home page tells the story about why I’ve moved away from the whole cougar thing, but just between you and me, I always felt it was a bit of a liability.

For the long term, it was not an identity that resonated, especially since I now have a partner who’s a member of my own generation! And for those of you new to my story, I met him online. You can read about it here.

It’s been at least 18 months since I even thought of a pretty young thing. Nothing against younger men – they can still turn my head – but when I found myself single after a long, long marriage, it was an itch I needed to scratch.

I married young. When I was last single, I was in my late teens. I guess it’s only natural (and not uncommon) that I defaulted again to younger men, sometimes a lot younger! I experimented with living poly solo for a couple of years, and during that time had several ongoing relationships with men significantly my junior. The closest was my intimate partner who was half my age.

It was quite a journey into dating again as an adult, an awful lot of disappointing sex with new partners (and some good times too), new friendships, and a few meaningful but rebellious relationships. I needed to question everything and give voice to the stifled young woman who’d played wife and mum for too long.

Those three-plus years dating again helped me to realise that I am, in fact, in mid life. And that’s OK. I’m getting closer, as I get older, with accepting who I am NOW – not who I was at 18, or 25 or 38. My life is still a work in progress, as is this blog, which I will gradually hone to distance myself from the ‘cougar’ notion and name.

I’ve got a ripper of a feature interview coming up next, so stay tuned, check your inbox and catch you soon!

bustier pic

EveΒ 

 

33 thoughts on “New decade, new name!

      1. I am; before Xmas we had a big scare, & several friends got evacuated, but the winds turned and so they were safe… we are really at the mercy of Mother Nature now aren’t we? πŸ™πŸΌ

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    1. What can’t you believe my dears? That I loathe the term ‘cougar’ and its negative connotations? Sadly, I can’t push uphill alone to redefine that word. Onwards and upwards towards my book being widely accessible and read across the world! As Scarlett would say, “Yassss!”

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  1. I absolutely love this blog. I’ve learnt so much more about the world of dating and navigating my way back into it after a long hiatus offline and not dating. It’s entertaining, funny, and vulnerable.

    I love the new name too. I’d love to read a book. Will there be a book? Please say yes!

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  2. Finding this blog was a godsend for me, Eve’s candid account of her sexual expeditions mirrored my own experiences in the midlife dating quagmire. Ten out of ten for real-life accuracy and thrilling reading – I can’t wait to get my hands on the book.

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  3. Hello my friend. The new direction was inevitable now that you are happily settled, and I am very happy for you.
    I guess that in these circumstances it must be a challenge to write new content, though, whilst still retaining the spirit of your blog? I will be interested to see your future writing for sure!
    I admire you greatly for your honest writing and your free-spirited nature and you were an inspiration to me when I started my own blog. Wishing you all the best!

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  4. Love the new name, babe. Just wanted to say that your blog is so bloody refreshing! Older women’s sexuality is so often packaged as shameful or the butt of a joke, and is rarely shared from the woman’s perspective, at least in popular culture. You write of the complexities of mid-life dating and mating with great honesty and thoughtfulness, balancing the intimate and personal with the broader perspective. So many women find themselves on this journey in mid-life and need authentic voices like yours to help make sense of their own experiences and, more than that, know that they’re not alone. Thank you for sharing.

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  5. Love the new name Eve! Well done πŸ™‚ It unashamedly defines an audience who I think have been left off the bookshelf – literally. Who is writing about the confluence of experiences that current midlifers are facing? These are people who did not grow up with technology yet need it now if they want any action at all – whether it be because they are separated and single or wanting to open their long term partnership up to others. Midlifers are also often chastised by the media or in private conversations for having a ‘crisis’ if they seek any type of personal evolution or exploration at this stage. So your new name is very refreshing because it reframes things as an adventure – not a crisis. And it’s not something just for the fresh faced. Seeking new relationships and fun is fine to do at any age. Dare I say it but I think the new title is age friendly! It fuses sexy with maturity – something that our youth focussed culture often does not. And I love your thoughtful blogs Eve. Your writing has substance but is also sassy. Look forward to seeing more!

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    1. Thank you so much Narissa. I love this comment because it addresses the social/political side behind my writing, and considers the bigger picture, which is what interests me most. I also like the way you name and shame the stereotypes about midlife people who, understandably in the modern age, look for more life challenges and personal growth. A century ago the average age for a woman was 51 years, now it’s 85 so we really do need to take seriously what we do in our ‘second half’ of life. As Gen Xers, we may even live longer, so we may as well make the most of it!

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  6. Eve, you have taken an otherwise taboo subject and given it this raw and reverent meaning. Creating this sacred space that is creative, fluid and honest. Inspiring people and offering hope… Your writing has this refreshing and irrevocable truth that resonates remaining with the reader. It’s not just enough to inspire, it actually imbues and feels life affirming. Somehow we are not merely witnessing but feel part of your journey.. it’s like being let into a secret .. without the shame..

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